For so long, I tried to present a version of myself that was untouchable. I wanted the world to see me as independent, strong, and completely in control—impenetrable, like nothing could hurt me. It seemed easier to put on this armor, to block out emotions that might make me seem vulnerable or weak. I didn’t want anyone to feel sorry for me, and I definitely didn’t want pity. The problem with building walls that high is that you eventually stop feeling. Or more accurately, you stop allowing yourself to feel, especially when it comes to emotions that require vulnerability.
I convinced myself that by avoiding uncomfortable emotions—grief, pain, fear—I was protecting myself. Avoiding those feelings seemed like a way to stay safe, to keep control over my life. In reality, I was not only shielding myself from pain but also from meaningful connections. Holding people at a distance kept me from forming deep bonds, and in trying to avoid hurt, I missed out on the joy that comes from opening up to others.
I started to believe that pain and betrayal were inevitable, and that expecting the worst was the safest route. If I didn’t open myself up, I couldn’t be hurt, right? Living that way—closed off and guarded—came at a high cost. I didn’t learn how to cope with emotions like grief or heartbreak because I never allowed myself to fully experience them. Instead of processing those emotions, I shut them down and expected disappointment from everyone, including myself. I was stuck in survival mode, thinking I was protecting myself when, in reality, I was just numbing myself.
This behavior didn’t just hurt me—it affected my relationships. In avoiding vulnerability, I created distance from the people I cared about. I didn’t trust anyone enough to let them in because I didn’t trust myself to handle the hurt if something went wrong. That lack of trust was a major barrier to my healing. I wasn’t allowing myself to form meaningful connections, and I was cutting myself off from my own emotional needs.
Healing has been about learning to trust myself again. It’s about allowing myself to feel, to experience the emotions I’ve been running from, and to trust that I can handle them. Giving yourself permission to cry isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength. It means you’re willing to feel the pain and trust that you can come out stronger. Vulnerability with yourself and with others is where true healing begins. It’s about breaking down the walls, allowing yourself to be seen, and trusting that you’ll know when to set boundaries to protect your heart.
Trusting yourself also means recognizing red flags and acting on them when necessary. It’s about setting boundaries that protect your peace without completely closing yourself off. Boundaries are not walls—they’re guidelines for how to engage with others in a way that supports your emotional health. When you trust yourself, you can navigate relationships while honoring your values and emotional needs.
Crying is okay. Feeling is okay. Admitting that you don’t have everything together is more than okay—it’s necessary. Vulnerability is where real healing happens. When you allow yourself to feel fully, you open the door to deep, meaningful relationships and a stronger sense of self. Those connections can help you grow, sustain you, and remind you that you don’t have to carry the weight of the world alone.
Today, I’m giving myself permission to cry. To feel. To be vulnerable. Trusting that I’ll come out stronger on the other side. If you’ve been holding back, putting on that brave face, I encourage you to do the same. Let yourself feel it all. You are stronger than you think, and you deserve the peace and connection that come from allowing yourself to heal.
#EmbracingVulnerability #HealingJourney #EmotionalHealing #PermissionToCry #TrustYourself #EmotionalGrowth #SetBoundaries #DeepConnections #GriefAndHealing #SecondBloom
